Just when you think it’s all going swimmingly ……..or Life Happens.
I can be a little like the duck. On the surface all is calm. People think I’m doing great. That’s just because they don’t see those feet flapping away underneath. Mostly that’s a strength. Sometimes I can keep swimming when I should dive for the weeds.
I don’t know why I didn’t think of this. Maybe because I’ve just been revelling in the sense of having got a life back. The last 2 years have been Hard. Not all the time, but a lot of it. And I don’t want to go on about that. I’ve been there done it and cried the tears, worn the t-shirt and ranted and raved. Ive hidden in my bed. forgotten to shower and had to make myself lists of whats important to get me through the day. yes honestly. They are on my phone as daily check lists and this time last summer I was still working through them every day to get myself going. Some days it worked.
Here’s the list:
- eat breakfast
- pack lunch
- wear something nice
- put earrings in and a bit of make-up ( work days)
- try to do something to make me smile
- have a walk
You see how it was? You may have been there too. I know I’m certainly not alone here. Depression and anxiety can affect any of us and I never quite realised before this time just what hard work it can be to come back from that.
Anyway I’m not interested in looking backwards here. Life is pretty damn good right now. I’m working less and my job stress has gone down, waaaaay down. I’m enjoying my job, hold the front page!
Those of you who’ve been around here a while know Ive been getting back into the garden, spending good time with my family and starting to play more. I have a great plan for this year. Its summed up pretty well as get fit, lose the fat.
Then today at work I got a bit of a bolt out of the blue. Something from my previous job came back to haunt me. I am going to be involved in something that might be pretty stressful and complex. If I let it.
And I realised I need to grab this opportunity with both hands, give it a good shake and say ‘I am not going to get stressed over this’. I am choosing to have a great life and its going to stay that way. So I am putting myself on the line here. I will deal with it on the day. I will do what I have to do as well as I can. And I will get on with being grateful for getting this life back and having as much joy out of it as is humanly possible.
How does that sound?!