Tag Archives: Affirmations

Fat Girl Slim – the reasons why

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Imagine you were to go to bed tonight and have a wonderful nights sleep .Whilst you are sleeping a miracle happens. When you wake up you are slim and fit and healthy. What would you notice? Thanks to Solution Focused Therapy for this idea Miracle Question

I would wake up alert and full of energy. I would love being able to choose what to wear because everything in my wardrobe fits well and looks great on me. I would look forward to my day and eating healthy food. I would feel great about myself.

Now some of those things are already true. I wake up feeling pretty good most days and I am happy with myself for making the effort to get slimmer and healthier. But some days its hard work and I need a little extra motivation

Well yesterday I was talking of coming up with a list of some of the reasons and motivations for losing weight. Here they are, or at least todays haul. I realise that many of them are shallow, if you think caring about how you look is shallow. The number one top priority for me is to be fitter and healthier but the benefits of feeling fantastic and looking great are I think the ones that will keep me going and ( I hope) keep me steady when I get there.

Feeling fitter and healthier

Not having to buy plus size clothes in plus size shops

Being able to find clothes I like in Oxfam ( all the good ones are under size 16)

Not getting Diabetes

Not ending up in hospital again with cellulitis

Being able to walk further and faster

Looking forward to an active retirement

Having knickers that don’t roll down

Wearing sleeveless tops more comfortably

Being full of energy

Looking better for myself

Being able to climb that mountain

Not falling asleep on the sofa at 9pm ( or earlier)

Not worrying whether I’ll fit into the seat on the plane/rollercoaster/bus

because I want to ive the rest of my life as a slim, fit, toned person

I want to have a wet suit and learn to scuba dive

I want to go horse riding on a beach

I want to be the me on the outside that reflects the me on the inside

I don’t want to be a yo-yo

Having my family and friends be proud of me

Being proud of myself

Feeling young for my age

Liking looking at photos of myself

 

Please add any other ideas in the comments. All motivators welcome!

 

 

 

Sufficient unto the day …

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Loch Lomond

I know when a phrase or idea or event keeps coming up that maybe the universe is trying to get my attention. I admit sometimes I can be slow to respond but over the last few weeks I’ve been nudged more than once and I’m trying to take notice.

A colleague shared with me how she was coping with a particularly stressful time at work. She made a decision not to worry about things until the day she had to deal with them. So if a big meeting or presentation was coming up on a Thursday she would do the work but not allow herself to worry about it until that morning. She said, “I know I will worry on the day and then it will be oer, so why spoil the rest of my life?” And laughed.

Yesterday a 13-year-old girl said to me, ‘Why worry about things till they happen?” and “If it’s over, its done with”. She said it with such assurance.

Driving home today a phrase came into my head and I just had to look it up when I got home.

” sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof”. Not surprisingly this is from the King James version of the Bible.

Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself: sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof. Matthew Ch6 v34

Being present and living in the moment are very much practices of mindfulness. This can be either a psychological strategy, a zen approach to life or both. 
If the problem has a solution, worrying is pointless, in the end the problem will be solved. If the problem has no solution, there is no reason to worry, because it can’t be solved.  Author Unknown 
And finally I am remembering that each day, every moment my thoughts create my tomorrow.

Louise Hay affirmation

Fat girl slim

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I want to lose weight. I want to get fit and be healthy for a long long time ie the rest of my life! I think I’m pretty focused on that. I have been watching what I eat ( complex carbs, good protein, no sugar, lower fat) and doing more exercise.

And guess what? It works. I have lost 20 lbs and I can tell I’m noticeably fitter and have more stamina. So you think Id be celebrating, right. Wrong.

I realised over the last couple of days how much my head gets stuck in negative thinking. I like to see myself as a positive, cup half-full sort of person, but in this instance I have to admit the evidence is against me. I beat myself up internally with negative thoughts like, ‘I’m not doing this fast enough’, or ” Im going to end up not able to walk and using a mobility scooter if I don’t do something’. I think I get stuck in being scared of what ‘might’ happen to my health if I ‘let myself’ carry on being fat and unfit.

But as my friend and partner kindly pointed out to me this morning this is all very negative thinking. The facts are, I’ve lost weight and am getting fitter. Somehow I don’t want to let go of the negative images. She on the other hand is using creative visualisation many times a day. And feeling positive, successful and losing weight steadily and happily every week. Go figure.

So as the queen of talk about affirmations and positive imagery I feel put in my place! Seriously, it was a gentle wake up call to ‘walk the talk’.

So I’ve been doing a bit of research and come up with some helpful bits and pieces.

Barbara Hoberman Levine, author of “Your Body Believes Every Word You say” talked about one man who read about hypnosis and began to affirm to himself, “I am not hungry.” He actually gained weight. Each time he told himself “I am not hungry,” he focused his attention inside to see if he was hungry. He thought about hunger so often that he put conscious energy into being hungry. He was more hungry when he used an affirmation denying hunger than when he didn’t think about hunger.

“Telling yourself not to do something, you focus attention on the very thing you are avoiding, making it harder to avoid,” says Barbara. The mind and imagination must focus on the positive goal.

The wording you use is also very important. You must use statements that your conscious mind can accept. In order for Affirmations to work they must be reasonable, believable and acceptable to the conscious mind, lest the mind dismiss the affirmation as mere wishful thinking. The mind must hear an affirmation and really believe it could be true or become

true.http://www.holisticonline.com/remedies/weight/weight_affirmations-for-weight-control.htm

The next thing I found was about The Law of Attraction, or ‘what you focus on grows’. I know this. I believe it. I’ve seen it happen over and over again. So now I need to apply it to myself in relation to being slim, fit and healthy. My focus has been too much on being fat, unfit and ill. Well, duh as Homer would say!

To use affirmations successfully with the law of attraction you must:

1. Use them build your beliefs as it is your beliefs that create your experience.

2. Engage your emotions in the affirmation process: let yourself feel what it be like to have what you want.

3. Make sure you have worked through the ‘ecology’ of what you want.

4. State the affirmation in the NOW.

5. Do ten minutes per day only, then forget about them.

I used the term ‘ecology’ in number 3 and this is very important. Ecology is the beliefs ‘around’ the changes that want to make. 

http://www.improveattraction.com/the-affirmations-list-for-the-law-of-attraction-success/

And here is another:

The Law states: I attract to myself, whatever I give my focus, attention, or energy to; whether wanted or unwanted. If you think about being broke, poor, lonely and believe your thoughts guess what? That is exactly what you’ll be. This Law applies to your life and every other person’s life on the planet. Like all laws, it is impartial and impersonal, which means it works when you want it to and when you don’t want it to.

Everything comes to us through the most elemental law of physics – Like Attracts Like! Like Attracts Like is nothing more than the Law of Attraction. It is absolute and has nothing to do with your personality, your religious beliefs, being a “good” or a “bad” person or anything else. No one lives beyond this Law. It is an unquestionable law of the universe.

http://applying-the-law-of-attraction.com/

So now to apply what I know.

To lose weight I must :

eat less and move more!

Set my target weight ( done!) I want to be in a healthy BMI ( Body Mass Index) range for my height so tha takes me to 11.5 stones or 161 pounds at the top end of the scale

Decide what I want to change, focus on it being in the present tense, first person and being action oriented, Then rehearse. Most guidance suggests rehearsing at least on waking and before going to sleep. Writing your intention out every day also helps and repeating whenever you can in the day.

Some writers suggest that affirmations that focus on ‘losing’ weight might not be as helpful as ones that focus on being slim and fit. This might be because our minds interpret ‘loss’ as something negative. Anyway, to not take the risk I think I’ll go for the positives and here is my first attempt.

I am slim and fit

I love being slim and fit

I walk with a spring in my step

I love exercising and eating healthy nutritious foods

I am going to work on these this week and report back!  If you have any other affirmations or suggestions please let me know. I love getting your comments and feedback and any encouragement will help spur me along 🙂

From now ………… to the slimmer version ………….to ……………………………………..

Small steps at the lakeside

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Small steps at the lakeside

We just walked alongside the lake and back. It is hot in England this lovely long Bank Holiday weekend. Much more like June than April. Summer has come early. The weather certainly seems to be changing consistently. Last winter was a hard one with temperatures plummeting to minus 20 whereas the summers seem to arrive early. I’m not going to complain about that! But I do think about the effect of global warming and how our world is changing.

Water does it for me. I love lakes, rivers, streams. I adore the sea. I think I am lucky living where I do, there are several lakes in easy reach even if we are a fair way from the sea. The sea needs a day trip whereas a walk by the lake is possible any old day. And then there are the canals. We live near the Trent and Mersey canal, and canals are an important part of our industrial heritage in this country as well as a source of pleasure. Nowadays its easy ( though not cheap!) to hire a barge ( narrow boat) and sail slowly along the waterways for a day or a holiday. But I love just walking along the canal tow-paths. Smiling at the boats and their cheerful livery, seeing the birds peeping out from the undergrowth.

So today we walked along the lake. I was using my sparkly pink walking poles and find I can walk so much better with them. I’m a bit unsteady on my feet, and last winter I had a lot of falls in the snow and ice and they have really knocked my confidence. I find myself feeling quite tearful occasionally when I’m going downhill as I’m so scared of falling over. But I reckon that practice is what I need and the poles are definitely helping there.

Always on the lake and in  noisy groups along the edge are the Canadian geese. The other day I heard a little boy of about three years old say to his mum, “Look BIG ducks. But they aren’t swimming ducks, they’re Statchoooos“. I was grinning all the way back.

In the middle of the lake is an island where the herons nest and breed. Today the RSPB were there with their fancy telescopes so we got to see the herons as if they were sitting right next to us. I love those birds. So graceful in flight and so regal as they sit high up in the trees or on the lakeside watching for fish.

The largest European heron. It can stand with neck stretched out, looking for food, or hunch down with its neck bent over its chest. In flight it holds its neck retracted and has large rounded wings. It is usually solitary although several birds may feed fairly close together. It stalks its food, often standing motionless for some considerable time. It usually feeds close to the bank or shore, but may wade out into shallow water.

I am feeling a little fragile today. Grateful for the sun and long weekend. Blessed by the peace of the lake and the sight of those herons. I think the feeling of unsteadiness on my feet makes me wobble a bit emotionally. I want to be able to walk steadily and with confidence again. Today was a little milestone for me. It’s the first time for a long while I have had the energy and stamina to walk the whole length of the lake and back again. That’s pretty special. Sometimes its easy to get bogged down in feeling tired, achy and a bit wobbly, feeling fat and unfit instead of recognising the gains and celebrating them.

        Louise Hay’s Wisdom Cards : what came up today

Just when you think it’s all going swimmingly…

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Just when you think it’s all going swimmingly ……..or Life Happens.

I can be a little like the duck. On the surface all is calm. People think I’m doing great. That’s just because they don’t see those feet flapping away underneath. Mostly that’s a strength. Sometimes I can keep swimming when I should dive for the weeds.

I don’t know why I didn’t think of this. Maybe because I’ve just been revelling in the sense of having got a life back. The last 2 years have been Hard. Not all the time, but a lot of it. And I don’t want to go on about that. I’ve been there done it and cried the tears, worn the t-shirt and ranted and raved. Ive hidden in my bed. forgotten to shower and had to make myself lists of whats important to get me through the day. yes honestly. They are on my phone as daily check lists and this time last summer I was still working through them every day to get myself going. Some days it worked.

Here’s the list:

  • shower
  • eat breakfast
  • pack lunch
  • wear something nice
  • put earrings in and a bit of make-up ( work days)
  • try to do something to make me smile
  • have a walk
You see how it was? You may have been there too. I know I’m certainly not alone here. Depression and anxiety can affect any of us and I never quite realised before this time just what hard work it can be to come back from that.
Anyway I’m not interested in looking backwards here. Life is pretty damn good right now. I’m working less and my job stress has gone down, waaaaay down. I’m enjoying my job, hold the front page!
Those of you who’ve been around here a while know Ive been getting back into the garden, spending good time with my family and starting to play more. I have a great plan for this year. Its summed up pretty well as get fit, lose the fat.
Then today at work I got a bit of a bolt out of the blue. Something from my previous job came back to haunt me. I am going to be involved in something that might be pretty stressful and complex. If I let it.
And I realised I need to grab this opportunity with both hands, give it a good shake and say ‘I am not going to get stressed over this’. I am choosing to have a great life and its going to stay that way. So I am putting myself on the line here. I will deal with it on the day. I will do what I have to do as well as I can. And I will get on with being grateful for getting this life back and having as much joy out of it as is humanly possible.
How does that sound?!

Thank you

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Grace

Thank you for the world so sweet

Thank you for the food we eat

Thank you for the birds that sing

Thank you God for everything.

 

Remember when everything was that simple?

Yesterday I read something a friend had written in a newsletter and it made me sit up and think: Radiant Recovery newsletter – Jenny’s story ( Kathleen’s article)

Talking about the ‘joy dots’ is just another way of re-framing. Noticing the ‘sparkling moments’ in our everyday lives, those tha get crowded out in the busyness, grunge and irritations of domesticity, work, relationships. Forgetting to say thank you, to each other, to Spirit or God, to ourselves.

Here is one of my favourite blogs by Leah whose mother always made her write thank you notes: Thanks

So for today here is my list:

Sunshine

Doggie devotion

A friendly plumber to mend the shower and stop that dripping!

Roses on the fireplace, pale pink with subtle green paper petals

For the arguments we have over silly petty things, that teach us more every day about each other

For the long-haul of a relationship through good times and bad, for knowing someone so well and being known. For sometimes wondering if we know each other at all and realsing we have lots of opportunities to get to know each other better

For kindness and compassion

For great residential care, you keep mum safe and happy and make my life a helluva lot easier and with much better sleep

For our extended, blended, complicated, wonderful family

For 4 boys who are pretty much men, you taught me unconditional love, both ways

blackcurrant tea

Red post vans – always hopeful you’ll have something for me

Kindle- I love getting free books, and you are making me read ones Id never have thought of if they weren’t

The gym – I can’t use you right now, but I like it that you’re there just waiting for me to burst back through those doors and get fit

Facebook – for happy hours spent looking at other peoples photos, making me laugh out loud with my oh so witty fb friends and giving me the impression I am funny and popular in my virtual world

Meditation – every day you remind me of how much I need you, how often I forget you and how calming and centering you can be.

Affirmation – You sit by my bedside, lurk in my notebooks and journal, whisper in my head. Sometimes I remember to use you. Thank you for giving me a nudge.

Exercise – oh how I love you, let me count the ways. Erm I am working on my couch potato existence, thank you for making it possible for this curvy, unfit, 50+ gymophhobe to have a vision of a curvier, fitter,60+++

Holidays – thinking of them, dreaming of them, imagining them, planning them. Wishing we could have one, counting the pennies, hours spent on brochures, travel sections, websites and talking to friends about them. Looking at photos of them, remembering weekends from Wales to Barcelona, retreats in Salisbury and Albuquerque, summers camping in Norfolk to villa in Croatia, roughing it at Glastonbury and birthday weekends in posh hotels in Manchester.

 

 

 

What you focus on grows …..

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A good friend reminded me the other night of the work of Pema Chodron, the American Buddhist nun. Digging out one of her books today ” When things fall apart’, made me think about the thorny old problem of accepting what is, the experience of now as the only moment we have. In my pondering moment, usually when falling asleep or waking up, I had a little nudge from my subconscious to focus on what I want to grow. So talking, thinking , writing about health, life, abundance and energy is great but it can be all too easy to let it slip into focusing on feeling ill, worrying about the future, complaining that I’m not getting better quicker.

We use all kinds of ways to escape-all addictions stem from this moment when we meet our edge and we just can’t stand it. We feel we have to soften it, pad it with something, and we become addicted to whatever it is that seems to ease the pain. Pema Chodron

So it seems to me that I need a bit of a plan 🙂

What works for me?

Daily affirmations: What do I know? I know they are best if they really resonate emotionally, so writing them for myself is the best way forward. I need to really look at my goals and then come up with an affirmation that fits the promise of that goal materialising. And its really important that the affirmation is in the present tense, my mind has to believe it is already taking place. And I know I can always fall back on the words and wisdom of teachers like Louise Hay whose ‘power ‘cards I have in my bedside drawer. Here are todays ‘random’ pickings:

An affirmation is a positive statement of (positive) belief, and if we can become one-tenth as good at positive self-talk as we are at negative self-talk, we will notice an enormous change. Julia Cameron

And here is my own for today : I am full of vibrant health and energy


Meditation Meditation is an invitation to notice when we reach our limit and to not get carried away by hope and fear.

In practicing meditation we’re not trying to live up to some sort of ideal-quite the opposite. We’re just being with our experience, whatever it is.

Pema Chodron

Writing –  I love this answer from Julia Cameron, author of the magical ‘The Artists Way’ on her Q and A

Q: One of the central themes of The Artist’s Way is the link between creativity and spirituality. How are they connected?

A: Creativity is a spiritual force. The force that drives the green fuse through the flower, as Dylan Thomas defined his idea of the life force, is the same urge that drives us toward creation. There is a central will to create that is part of our human heritage and potential. Because creation is always an act of faith, and faith is a spiritual issue, so is creativity. As we strive for our highest selves, our spiritual selves, we cannot help but be more aware, more proactive, and more creative.

Writing something every day is part of my path to wellness. I have always written since I was old enough to hold a pen, poems and stories, musings, posts and emails. But my creative writing had dried up along with my energy, health and general well being. No coincidence there then. So this period of the gift of being home and recuperating with spring in the air and the beginnings of new life all around has given me the opportunity to re-connect. My commitment is to write something every day. I may not always share, but the process of ‘putting something out there’ has a sort of symbolism of its own. I want to be accountable for my health, my creativity and for being connected. If I can write something tha connects with someone else then that is a joy and somehow part of my healing.

Today we heard of the death of a friend. A woman of life, laughter and fun, passion, committment and friendliness. This is for her. RIP Lynne wherever you are.